the girl yesterday did a decent reading. and like i said.... she was honest. although her advice wasn't that novel. let go of expectations. when you let go, that's when you get back.
i mean...obviously. because if you don't expect anything then you are never disappointed when what you want doesn't happen. and you are always happy because you are always surprised.
i think hope is just an idealized form of expectation. i wake up with the hope that today things will get better. and everyday they are the same. i am trying to change. it isn't easy.
i miss someone terribly. and there isn't anything i can do about it except try to not miss them. it is hurting my heart. i let them go, but i can't let go of them. they're too special to me. and i'm the one left with a worried heart.
i'm supposed to also keep my heart open. but it's so hard.